The VCO Experiment Part 3 (Update and Conclusion)

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So I'm starting to figure out that you're supposed to make tutorials AFTER you've mastered something, or else you're going to end up with constant updates. And heartbreak from false expectation. And suicide. Okay maybe not suicide.

Obviously, my subconscious was on to my noobishness, hence the title of this series having the word "experiment" in it - a caveat that f*ckingshit, this girl has no idea what she's doing.

I'm just as confused as you are. I just thought you should know. It isn't you, it's me.

I thought the experiment done with this post and me at least getting a small bottle's worth of oil for all the trouble, until I noticed the "useless" curd was STILL separating. Clear stuff was rising to the surface (clearer than the "oil" I'd gleaned from the first few steps) while white was sinking and turning into a cream color. Yuck.

I just figured that this was virgin coconut oil too, and started the tedious process of transferring the clear liquid into my oil jar by spoon. Then I put the stuff in the refrigerator and left the rest of the curd on a table.

Some 6 hours later, I went to check on the oil in the ref and found that the new clear oil had hardened into a plastic-looking disc. The old "oil" was still on the bottom of the jar, still in its liquid form. I took the plastic disc out and let it melt in another bowl.

That was about a week ago. The curd is still separating! Meanwhile, the clear oil that melted from the plastic disc is what I'm using (I got around the same amount as what I thought was the final product) while the "oil" I got from following the tutorial went bad. I doubt oil's supposed to do that.

In conclusion, the tutorial I was following seemed legit, but its all lies!!! And because I'm the kind of asshole that hates leaving you guys chained to the wall and following shadow-tutorials, I'll go refine the process and post a proper tutorial. With better pictures. When baby-daddy is in my side of the sea with his fancy 5D by then. Wa ko nagpadungog Chris. Hehe.

The VCO experiment PART 2

In my previous post, I (with some help, hehe) embarked on the most noble quest of creating my own all-in-one super baby product. You may access steps 1 - 5 here.

What I didn't mention was that I set aside a smaller container with milk from the same batch. After the 40 hours I mentioned in the last post, I put the smaller container in the refrigerator and left the bigger batch sitting in maternal lola's china cabinet in case the oil decided to settle some more.

This morning, when I went to check on the control batch - the top curd was hard as soap. I removed the stuff and set it aside, wondering if it could still be useful in some way. Meanwhile, the bottom was pure oil.

I put some on my skin, worried that maybe it looked too watery. But it was glorious. It's a light oil, lighter than what you'd get from the heat-based process (which I learned to do in high school), and it smelled like vanilla. I was expecting this part to be an exaggeration on most websites but it's true! It does not smell one bit like someone's grandmother the way refined coconut oil does. :D

One of the things coconut milk is great for is lice removal. In the provincial grade school where I spent half of elementary, it was more embarrassing to show up with your head smelling like lana (coconut oil) than if your head was covered with the tiny terrors. Disgusting, but true.

After the control batch turned out successful, I decided the bigger batch was probably done feeling left out of the action, so I put it in the refrigerator. I wondered if the extra time had caused the stuff to go bad, like maternal lola kept saying it would. My mother obviously has no faith in me. So boys and girls, this is the continuation of the cold compressed virgin coconut oil tutorial:

The VCO experiment PART 1

Does anyone remember those Surf ads that became popular a decade ago? I was in high school then, and remember how people (including myself) waited for advertisements of a local laundry soap brand instead of the prime time telenovelas of the same time slot. These commercials were about a young wife's inexpensive solutions to household problems. The advertisements petered out into actual drama though and I soon lost interest. The need to become a "wais na misis" or a clever homemaker never disappeared though.

Before we even got together, co-parent and I were part of this big dream to live on an off-grid, eco-friendly, fully sustainable paradise (with solar panel controlled radio stations and grey water fountains. kidding). The dream sort of came crashing down when the owner of the lot turned dirty old man on one of the females involved in the would-be commune. -_-;;

We decided the dream didn't have to end there though, in fact the coming of the kid could be an excuse to bring the dream to life in small manageable ways. Baby steps so to speak. The kind we burgis brats can deal with.

One of the things we realized we needed to get over was the idea of grocery stores.

At first it was hard to wrap one's head around. No more aisles and aisles of colorful products. No more people watching at the produce section. No more imported fruits.

But the more I read about the alternatives, the more I came to appreciate the granola way. No shampoo? Use vinegar. No bleach? Use vinegar. No detergent? Use vinegar. No souring agent? Use vinegar. No more decision fatigue!!!

What's even cooler is that you can make it from coconuts. We have coconuts. We have tons of coconuts. We have so much of them that there are probably more coconut concussion related deaths here than car accidents.

Serial killer

It helps that maternal lola's big on coconuts. She and a bunch of former Cocofed scholars got together and created an NGO called Kabukonet that teaches people in the country how to make export-quality products out of the nuts. Let's give them a round of applause for their efforts in reducing coconut-related deaths empowering the rural poor. :)

Instead of making vinegar though, I decided to try my hand at making Virgin Coconut Oil (VCO) because it tickled my subversive bones to not pay for expensive baby products. You can use VCO to treat cradle cap, diaper rash and croup; you can use it instead of mineral (petroleum based) baby oils and lotions; you can even use it in baby food (like breastmilk, VCO is high in lauric acid). Edumicate yourself cretin!